Hello
I did not make a last day of the year post. Or a first day of the year post. But I have been thinking these last five days; what should I put out there for my readers.
I had to step back. I had to reflect and one conversation this morning inspired me to write. Inspired me to open up. Inspired me to make change.
I am taking a stand. I have been going about LOVE the wrong way these past many months. I am not going to get what I want by continuing on this path.
I needed a wake-up call. A jolt. A catastrophic epiphany.
So, this is the day I decided to change my life. January 5th, 2013.
No more living for others, living for me, myself and JESUS.
I know I have been here before but I figured it out, why I will never be as happy as I want to be. So, with that said, I am breaking up with all of them. Breaking my ties and focusing on doing what is right. Focusing on my needs and wants. What I really want; not those things I said I wanted because I knew it would ultimately make him happy. I'm done with that. I'm done with being That girl.
So, what am I going to so drastically be doing?
Day One, breaking up with the one I've been with, for real this time.
It's going to be me, myself and Jesus (in case you missed the first time I said it). As hard as it may be, as lonely as I may get, I need to step back from that. I am ultimately unhappy and I always will be with him and that is not good.
The smiles and laughs were great but the sorrows and pains will be greater.
The rewards and blessings will be great and if he can be there when I transform, then I will know it was real. If not, then it was not meant to be like the first one. The Lord has got to be tired of me saying this, but I'm gong to succeed this time. I have to.
Putting God first has to be the only thing that matters most. Loving others but not putting themselves before me. Serving others but not being a doormat.
A challenging task lies ahead but you will be able to witness.
It is time.
